


The boy who accepted the Star

by RobbieTurner



Series: Peggy Carter is immortal [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fairy Tale Elements, post-movies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 00:39:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5607115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RobbieTurner/pseuds/RobbieTurner
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the end of the infinity-wars, having helped saving the universe, Steve receives a gift: a single wish, his heart's most desired.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The boy who accepted the Star

**Author's Note:**

> Steggy Secret Santa gift for @mystuckyfeels on tumblr :) I hope you like it!

And so there, in the trashed terrain, in the diluted fever of victory, in the longest second of the world, Steve Rogers spoke first, like he had when the Avengers won their first battle:

“We won.”

Thanos was defeated. The war theatre was Iceland, with all its dark, cold beauty. The warriors, in different degrees of damage, were Tony Stark (his armour falling in pieces, his barren mouth bleeding), Jessica Jones (nursed by Luke Cage, one broken arm, fractured ribs), Clint Barton (bowless but alive), Natasha Romanova (pale, hurt, holding Bucky - whose metal arm had been ripped from him - against her by the waist). Sam Wilson, Thor Odinson, Bruce Banner, Wanda Maximoff, Vision, T’challa – all of them still processing the reality of triumph.

From Thanos a single thing remained: An infinity Gauntlet, where the infinite stones laid motionless, and, for now, harmless.

 

Strange days followed. Alien feasts were held for them. They were saluted as heroes in corners of the Galaxy they had no idea existed. Authorities of different planets shook their hands. It was too much, too exhausting, and by the end almost everyone had gone back home to Earth. The last celebration was in Asgard and, from the large group of heroes, only Thor, Tony and Steve were present.

In Steve, a certain peacefulness tainted in the edges by a familiar melancholy. He was happy, exultant even. They had been heroes and had done what heroes should do: protect the vulnerable, save the defenceless. But he couldn’t trick himself in believing that he had stayed for the celebrations out of a genuine desire to be celebrated. He lingered there, because, in truth, he didn’t have a home to go back to after the battle.

It was good, the three of them. Sharing the warmth of the Asgardian party, each one painfully aware of each other’s scars. In a few years they had become old friends, Tony, Thor and him. Steve knew _they_ knew that his smile was not always honest and his heart was heavy and his eyes were tired and thankfully the billionaire and the God knew better than to talk about it.

He spent his last night in Asgard looking at a pinkish sky with all its moons, at the shimmering waters beneath it. He thought of how Tony was going back to Pepper and Thor to Jane and how he had no one to go back to and how very selfish he was, preoccupied with his unimportant, irrelevant human emotions.

 

“Wake up, my friend. There is something we must share with you.”

It was Thor’s voice, a gentle rumble, and Steve got out of the bed, confused, a little worried.

“Did something happen?”

He asked Thor, who smiled and answered:

“Only good things. Come, I shall enlighten you.”

He followed Thor to a solemn looking hall where Odin sat on a throne and Tony waited, looking impeccable as if he hadn’t slept at all.

“Good morning, Cap. If it’s morning. Can’t tell in space.” Tony said.

“Are we all getting brunch?” Steve offered, to which Tony smiled.

“Better than that.”

Odin raised from his seat and, holding a wooden box, walked towards them. He was an imposing figure and for a moment Steve wondered if they had done something wrong. But both Tony and Thor were calm so it was unlikely. Not for the first time he felt as if he knew way less than everyone else in the room.

Odin opened the box. Inside there was the gauntlet and the stones.

“For longer than time can measure have the stones been separated,” he said, looking gravely at them “and now, they must part again. Asgard shall keep the Tesseract safe, and the other gems will be placed in equally reasonable hands. Thus, the safety of the Universe can be ensured.”

 _Makes sense,_ Steve thought, _what started this whole mess was getting these stones together._ But why was Odin telling them this, why now?

Thor and Tony both seemed to know the answer because none of them spoke a word.

“But first,” Odin continued, “the battle you faced was trying and long, and having faced it without the hope of compensation you have become worthy of a gift no Midgardian has received before.”

He made a pause and then proceeded:

“A single wish – that’s what the six stones united can give you. Any wish, for the stones will bend time and space to make it true. You, warriors, deserve it.” He looked at the three of them. “I will let you deliberate now.” Odin said and then, carrying the box, he left them.

Steve let out a long breath.

“You knew about this?” He asked the other two.

“Thor told me last night.” Tony explained.

“We were discussing the possibilities and we have reached an agreement.” Thor said.

_Oh._

“So…so you chose the wish?”

“No,” Tony answered. “we think it should be you.”

Steve didn’t understand at first.

“What?”

“You, my friend.” Thor elucidated. “You are worthy of the wish. Anthony and I have decided that you should be the one to use it, to ask for whatever your heart desires the most.”

Steve looked at them in disbelief.

“You can’t be serious.”

“We are.”

“But you could ask for _anything_.”

“Exactly.”

He turned to Tony, appealed to him:

“Are you ok with this?”

Tony smiled, casual, but his eyes were focused, honest.

“Yeah. I mean, look at me. I’m handsome, rich, a genius, have a knock-out girlfriend. What else can I ask for? Well, a burger, but I doubt that even the infinite stones can make one better than those from that diner near your house. And Thor… well, he is a God. And he has amazing hair, so… we got it covered. While you, fancy pants, don’t even own a blue-ray”

“Tony, I’m serious.” Steve said, his voice controlled.

“So am I.” the billionaire answered. “You deserve it, Steve.”

He looked at them for a while longer, as if waiting for them to change their minds, to realise what they were tossing away. When it became clear that they wouldn’t, Steve mumbled:

“I need some time to think about it.”

 

In his moments of selfishness Steve thought of the life that was stolen from him. It was a strange feeling to him, selfishness. He didn’t have much room for it in his childhood and a selfish soldier is a bad soldier. A selfish Avenger was almost unheard of.

Laying in his Asgardian bed he thought of what he wanted, of _whom_ he wanted, of the implications of his egoistical desire. He could ask for whatever he wanted, why not something that could benefit a whole lot more people than just him alone? But the wish was granted to him, only him, an unexpected prize he never dreamed of earning. Until now he had felt as if he was peeking at life through the curtains of a backstage, living only when he was needed to play his part: the hero, the commander, the captain. He wanted to be whole.

What he wanted was Peggy.

It was foolish, perhaps. He had no guarantees that his life would be better with her. Maybe they would fight and separate, maybe she would find someone else, maybe they simply wouldn’t fit. But he wanted the chance that everyone around him seemed to have. He had not only fallen in love with her, he had _loved_ her, and loved her still. It was a sort of curse: to remember so perfectly the shape and taste of lips he had kissed only once, the smell of a perfume long gone, the particular bends of her accent, the treasure of her smile. A sort of curse: to love a dead woman, to have buried the love of his life without consuming it first. And now, like in a fairy tale, as simple as kissing a frog, his curse had a solution.

 

“Stop being so selfless. You make the rest of us look bad.”

Tony said to him, as they walked through the snowy gardens of Asgard.  

“If you knew what I want you wouldn’t be saying this.” Steve answered him.

“I don’t have to know. The fact that you’re taking so long to wish for it is what gives you away, Cap.”

“I have to use it wisely, Tony.”

Tony stopped and looked at him.

“No, you have to use for what you _want._ Your wish, if I know you, is not to rule over the Earth or for the Mets to win every season. Come on, your wish can’t be terrible. You don’t have a dark side, remember?”

Steve laughed a melancholy laughter.

“But I have a selfish one.”

“You are _supposed_ to, Steve. You are human. Please, don’t make me get cheesy with you.”

He looked at Tony.

“What would you say?”

The billionaire shrugged.

“I don’t know. That you’re my friend. That you deserve to be happy. That you’re the best of us. The usual.”

Steve smiled.

“Thanks, Tony.”

“Don’t thank me, this is all hypothetical.”

Asgard was beautiful around them and they stopped to appreciate it. That golden sky, those opulent constructions. Beautiful, yes, but now Steve missed the corners of Brooklyn, the colour of the bricks, the skyscrapers. He knew it was costing Tony all of his self-control not to ask him, so he decided to say it before he needed to.

“It involves another person. My wish, I mean.”

“So you gonna wish for Barnes to get a better haircut? That’s actually a favour for humanity.”

“You think you’re very funny.”

“I don’t think, I am.”

That joke allowed a much needed pause before the seriousness set in again.

“It’s about Peggy, right?”

 When Steve didn’t answer Tony pressed on:

“The last thing you are is mysterious, Rogers.”

He sighed.

“Yes. It’s her. I don’t know if I have the right to ask for something like that.”

“It’s not wrong wanting to share your life with the person you love. I got to do it with Pepper, you deserve it too.”

So it came, the deepest of doubts, the one Steve was trying not to think of.

“What if… she doesn’t want to? What if I bring her back only to find out that she’d rather…?”

Tony looked at him for a moment.

“I think that’s impossible, Steve. Aunt Peggy… for her, it was always you. Until the end. She’d be happy.”

He stretched, then, trying to shake off the emotion behind his words.

“Geez. Look at me, giving you life advice. Get your shit together, Rogers. I don’t want people to think I have _feelings_ or something.”

Steve smiled again. The decision yet to be made, the answer like a word he was afraid to say.

 

_“Is this truly your heart’s desire?”_

_Odin had asked him, looking solemn and at the same time detached, too ancient a being, to preoccupied an existence to fully mind human business._

_“Yes.” Steve answered, without hesitation._

_“Once it is done you cannot go back. Are you sure?”_

_He opened his mouth once more to answer…_

A dog barks outside. A common sound, but it gives him a tender comfort. A sort of miracle, after the things they had seen, that the World was carrying on as if nothing had happened. That dogs were barking and bread was being made, that people were still laughing and living. It’s hard for him to take some credit for that. It feels like being greedy. And had him not being greedy enough?

So he rises, still thankful for this morning, still thankful for the mattress he slept on. His blond hair falling over his eyes like he was twenty-two again. A tight knot in his stomach, while he lists thoughts in his head, things to distract him. But the smell reached him already so he knows the truth. He walks slowly towards the kitchen of his small apartment in Brooklyn – now he can finally afford one – and his heart is still frail inside his chest, just like when he was small, when he thought he would die young and unloved. He taught himself not to want too much, not to expect too much. But now he wants with a ferocity that hurts, with a clarity that is impossible to conceive. He can’t trick his heart.

“Steve?”

Peggy turns to him, the handle of the pan in her hand. From there comes the delicious smell: eggs in a basket.

“You sleep very soundly for a soldier.” She smiles, and turns back to what she’s doing.

The tightness in his chest expands, turning to the other end of the spectrum, and just as painful. Everything as it once was: the deep brown of her hair, the redness of her lips. But her hair is loose now, and she wears a robe over what seems like – he blushes – a light camisole. As if they are already lovers and this intimacy had been earned. He feels – even though he’s not – virginal. He sees her and all the other colours fade from his mind.

“Peggy” he gasps. He does what any other would do – he holds her. His arms enveloping her waist, his chest pressing against her back, and, in the sweet smell of her hair, deep between her curls, his pressed face, his hidden tears. He holds her not only because he fears this may not be real, but also because he never longed to touch something so much. She’s warm, so perfectly _true_ in his embrace.

“You thought I wouldn’t like it” she says, letting go of the pan to put both her hands over his arms. “Oh, Steve.” She turns then, facing him, taking his face between her hands. His cheeks are wet and Peggy kisses the tears gently. She lets him hug her again, sensing that even the minimal distance between their bodies is painful. “You couldn’t be more wrong. I feel blessed. I feel blessed, my darling.”

“I missed you.” Steve manages. Not one to cry easily and now that he started he doesn’t know how to stop it. He feels vaguely ashamed. Of crying in front of her, of wanting this woman so much he allowed the universe to be bended for her to come back. But these are all secondary feelings that pale next to the crushing happiness.

They stay like this for some time, while the eggs and the bread burn in the pan.

His eyes are still humid, their blue intensified when he looks at Peggy. He holds her by the chin, making her head tilt slightly, and kiss her on her lips. Not an innocent peck this time, not a hurried embrace while the engines roared in their ears. Steve tastes her, he _consumes_ her. She is just as eager and then he realises, feeling foolish for taking so long, that she was robbed of her life too. That maybe the feeling of elation in his chest is echoed in hers. Maybe, _maybe –_ he’s just as essential to her as she is to him.

He turns off the gas. The food is black now, and uneatable. But they are not hungry now. Not for food, anyway.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! English is not my first language so I apologise for any mistakes ;;  
> thank you @belle-lorage for reading and crying about steggy with me.


End file.
